A life that never ends
by Elsie Allen
Summary: Oneshot, with inner monologue Caroline finds out Silas can get into Klaus' minds and Stefan doesn't come back with the cure from Katharine. Stress is literally eating her apart.


"If Silas can make you, of all people, believe that you're dying…" Caroline trailed off, fear transparent on her face. "What can he do to the rest of us?"

Klaus opened his mouth to reply, but quickly shut it, having no definitive answer to give.

"Klaus…" Caroline mumbled, trying to collect her thoughts.

Free to walk the Earth again, to maim or torture at will, and powerful enough to alter The Original Hybrid's mind, Silas was a foe worthy of the fear he employed. This fear, too apparent in the vast emptiness of the Mikaelson mansion, would have been left unnoticed by Klaus if not for Caroline's unsteady voice as she spoke to him.

"Caroline, it seems you are in need of distraction." Klaus smiled politely at Caroline, who frowned, deep in thought.

Being a vampire put an infinity of questions in her mind, though she never spoke them out loud. After all, who was there to listen to the incessant gibbering of a silly little girl? Caroline, the epitome of self-absorption and insecurity, was suddenly, upon turning, grounded in reality. She had a perspective that, alive, she could never have fathomed.

Klaus was worried as he watched emotions flicked across Caroline's features at super human speed. He counted himself lucky to have met Caroline, even if she rebuffed most of his feelings towards her. To Klaus, seeing through Caroline was an easy task. As her unnecessary breaths sped up he spoke again.

"Caroline," Klaus tried, speaking gently for her benefit, "Can you tell me what's bothering you right now?"

Her eyes shot up quickly, meeting his and widening in surprise.

"Oh, it was just-" She begins, but cuts herself off, not wanting to bring up the witches massacre. "You know, it doesn't even matter."

Caroline plastered a smile on to her face and quickly changed the subject, for both of their benefit, slowing her breath deliberately.

"Well if you need anything else don't call me." She warned, moving to leave.

"Wait," Klaus implored, grabbing Caroline's arm as she began her walk away. After a hard look from Caroline he let go, sheepishly.

"I was simply wondering if you would like to accompany me for a bite to eat." He smirked and continued when Caroline didn't immediately reject his offer, only shifting her weight to a different foot.

"Although, the town is on Vervain so you'll have to travel with me." It's a shot in the dark, he realizes, watching the emotions play on Caroline's face as she forms an excuse.

"I have to call Stefan, and then-" She begins, but Klaus cuts her off, too aware she was not just declining a meal, but his company as well.

"It's fine, Caroline. Another time." He walks closer, grabbing Caroline's shoulders tenderly. He looks into Caroline, eyes roving desperately, mind working doubly, trying to find the right combination of words to ask the question that was heavy inside of him.

"Friends, then?" He tries, mentally grimacing at the simplicity of his spoken words. For a moment, Caroline seems to let compassion overtake her features. But, in an instant, her attitude contours negatively.

"Are you going to let Tyler come back into town?" She tries. When she only meets silence as an answer Caroline shakes Klaus off and walks away.

"You may have noticed," Klaus says, halting Caroline's exit, "I'm not exactly scouring the Earth for him, am I?"

In reply she gives him a weak smile, leaving as slowly as her feet will take her, mind spinning in circles. She relished leaving Klaus' presence. This, was not in much favor of his company, but rather because of her own loneliness.

To her great relief, night passed her by quickly as she lay in bed. But, upon waking, she was plagued with regret. It seemed that every morning it all of her memories came back full force, leaving Caroline crippled with grief. Vividly, and against her better judgment, Caroline relived massacring the witches. She relived Tyler leaving, and what it meant that she had completed the final task for Silas.

She pushed herself from bed in a near panic and began perusing her closet for something to wear manically. She wished she had the nerve to go see Bonnie, but decided to let her condition simmer for awhile. At length, Caroline decided her outfit and departed towards the Salvatore Boarding House, eagerly awaiting Stefan, Damon, and Elena's return and the distraction it would bring.

Damon returned with Elena after an hour had passed. Stefan was slightly later, since he had been charged with dropping off the Original sister. After a few moments in their presence Caroline's mind slowed considerably, though it was nowhere near stopping.

"So what if Silas can mess with our heads?" Elena asked the room, flopping down onto the largest sofa. "There's enough of us that it won't matter if he manipulates just one."

"It matters because if he raises the dead there's no telling what he could have them do to get the cure." Stefan began speaking louder for emphasis, eying Damon. "You know, the one we didn't get from Katharine."

"Katharine still has the cure?" Caroline asked, aghast. Stefan stole another glance at Damon before answering.

"She tricked us." He supplied.

"Oh, this is great." Caroline ran her hand through her hair haphazardly.

"We don't think Silas will raise the veil until after he gets the cure, of course." Damon spoke, walking in front of the couch Elena sat on. Her eyes began to follow him as he moved.

"But, just in case," Stefan interrupted, "I think we should see if what the witches did to Bonnie helped. We may need some extra protection around here."

"As if Bonnie can do anything I can't do." Damon muttered vainly, rolling his eyes.

Caroline perks up slightly at the mention of her best friend, which Elena notices. With a sly smile, Elena begins speaking.

"Only if Caroline doesn't come." She weaves harshness into the words. "She did, after all, kill the witches that were saving her."

Caroline freezes, and in an instant, both Stefan and Damon have their eyes trained on her, unreadable but intense.

"They were going to kill her." Stefan spoke readily, as if he memorized the lines, "Right? So maybe Caroline did us a favor. We might need Bonnie."

"Maybe she didn't." Elena snapped. "Maybe with Bonnie dead Silas wouldn't be able to complete his mission to get rid of the veil."

Elena stood up and made her way over to Caroline, still frozen. Cautiously, as if she were caressing a small animal, Elena brushed the hair out of Caroline's face. Finally, Caroline stepped back to avoid what might end up as a snapped neck.

"Relax," Elena said to no one in particular. "I won't kill her."

"Elena…" Stefan warned, inching a step closer.

"Why would I kill her?" She asked, as if her question had the most obvious answer in the world. "She'll just come back, now."

"Oh my god," Caroline sputtered quietly. "It's all my fault. I'm a murderer."

"Elena, that's enough." Stefan commanded coolly, hoping to ease the pressure on Caroline.

"Whatever." Elena said flippantly. She then dashed to Damon's side and grabbed his car keys from the pocket of his heavy leather jacket. "Who wants to go for a bite before we see Bonnie?"

Caroline knew she wasn't included in "we". Nearly dumbstruck from the humiliation of her innermost thoughts being put on display by Elena, she attempts to recover artificially. Stefan eyes her warily and then sends a look to Damon, which apparently was not lost in translation.

"I'll take Caroline hunting." Stefan says out loud, but the words pass through Caroline. "That is, if you're hungry."

In an instant Caroline snaps out of her thoughts and joins Stefan, walking out of the boarding house, leaving Damon and Elena behind.

They walk in silence, Caroline pushing slightly ahead of Stefan. The hush is thick, and with each step their minds vie frantically to begin conversation.

They reach the edge of the woods quickly and Caroline turns around, causing Stefan to stop in his tracks.

"I didn't think I should see Bonnie, either." She says, not looking Stefan directly in the eyes. "Not just because I massacred all of those people," her words rush out of her mouth like an excuse. "Because she's still messed up by Silas.

"I know it's hard," Stefan tried explaining, "But those deaths were an accident, not your fault at all."

He takes a deep breath, whether out of habit or for effect, and continues attempting to soothe the guilt inside of her.

"I know." Caroline says, desperate to drop the subject even if she didn't believe it. "It doesn't matter. Let's eat."

They had their fill and Stefan left to meet Damon and Elena on their way to Bonnie. Caroline, both relieved and unnerved by Stefan's departure, collapsed onto the forest floor with her back against a tree.

Somehow, it seemed that no matter what good happened bad always came along, too. Without thinking about it too long, she retrieved her cell phone from her pocket and dialed Tyler's number, which she had memorized months ago. It went directly to voicemail, and she made a frustrated noise.

'Hey, it's Ty, leave me a message.' The voicemail beeped for her to begin her message.

"Tyler," Caroline began, but immediately her words were stuck in her throat. "Tyler, I can't-" She tried again but her throat closed. "I need you, Ty, I can't-" Water welled up in her eyes and she put her hand over her mouth momentarily.

Because the tears began falling, Caroline couldn't finish her thought.

"I killed 12 people, Ty. Silas is going to lift the veil, and it all my fault." She let the tears flow freely down her face, not caring. "I can't do this Tyler. I just really wish that yo-"

'Voicemail full. To re-record your message press-' The phone spat its offensive words at Caroline. She opened her mouth wide in shock, dropping her phone carelessly, retreating into her mind.

She then began sobbing in earnest. She sobbed for her human life and for the coven of witches she massacred. She wept for Tyler, uncontrollably.

"Oh god, oh god, oh god…" She chanted, rocking back and forth, mussing her hair with her fingers. For awhile she looked for a solution for her sorrow but could find none. Clueless, and without a definite plan, Caroline Forbes wiped the tears from her face and took off at vampire speed for the Mikaelson mansion. She was determined, and ready to raise hell to get Tyler back in Mystic Falls.


End file.
